"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
