are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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