Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
