she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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