you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
My vagina just clenched in fear
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
