I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
