He is such a slut. More and more my type.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
