You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Enjoy the penises
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
