Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize
