but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
