i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize