You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
