Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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