Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
