its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I need to sanitize my soul.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
