soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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