so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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