I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
