I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
