$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
