my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
