So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize