so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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