i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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