But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
