Are we in a gay sports bar?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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