her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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