His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize