Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
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