oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I'm always down for nudity.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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