Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
