i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Randomize
