His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
