wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
