I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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