I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
