My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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