Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize