I skipped work to stalk him.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
