dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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