How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
