these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
