oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
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