where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
