He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
