Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
