Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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