ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize