I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
