Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize