Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You need Xanax blowdarts
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
