ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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